What is the inner child?
The inner child is an essence within us that we had since birth. Something that is already built within us.
Everyone has an inner child, of course, this does not mean you have a
split personality.
Simply put, it can also be referenced to as your childhood innocence.
We use the word innocence as something being pure and naive.
This is a part of us that has yet to be affected or influenced by the outside world.
Can the inner child become damaged?
Absolutely.
The inner child is highly sensitive to fear, hurt, and pain.
When introduced to these negative emotions the child will have a hard time processing such complex thoughts and emotions.
The shock alone from traumatizing events can cause damage to their mental and physical wellbeing.
Situations that shatter the inner child:
- Traumatic events (accidents, loss, serious illnesses, violence, etc.)
- Abuse (emotional, mental, physical, and or sexual)
- Neglect
I believe that this neglected, wounded, inner child of the past is the major source of human misery.
John Bradshaw
Signs your inner child could be wounded:
- Patterns of dysfunctional relationships
- Addiction
- Insecure or feelings of low self-worth
- Avoidant of emotions/feelings
- Impulsive/ reckless behavior
- Anger/ temperament instability
- Social anxiety
- Mommy/Daddy issues
- Abandonment issues
- You think people will always either hurt you or leave you
Three ways to heal your inner child:
1. Have the courage to make your life into what you have always dreamed of. Go for the happiness you have always desired. Waking up in the morning should not be filled with dread, when you live by your passions you can’t wait to get up the next morning and to start your day!
2. Live in a way that you feel is authentic to you. This has nothing to do with anyone else, but everything to do with YOU! As a rule, I think it is fair to be able to live in a way that makes you happy as long it is not harming another.
3. Acknowledge your inner child. The wounding of your inner child is not your fault.
For example, if a child was bullied by another child would it be appropriate for the bullied child to take self-blame for what happened to them?
Of course not! Don’t be too hard on yourself for the past. Some things are out of our control.
However, it is your responsibility to care for and nurture your inner child if it has been wounded.
As with any hurt child, you will need to display love, care, and patience.
Imagine this!
If you could go back in time to speak with your child self, what would you say? How would you encourage them?
You can also write a letter to express your sentiments.
By staying open-minded and listening to the needs and desires of your inner child, you open yourself up to the possibilities of anything and everything.
Kim Ha Campbell
