If you have fallen out of love with a partner then you understand that is not something that anyone purposely plans. It hurts both parties not just one…
Have you ever caught yourself questioning how you don’t really know what’s going on with your life anymore?
You turn to your partner next to you and wonder where it all went wrong, how have you fallen out of love with them and what it all means to this relationship?
Where were the signs, why didn’t you see it coming?
Many times, we find ourselves stuck in this dilemma of an unfulfilled relationship or marriage.
We feel like we want out but at the same time, we feel conflicted.
If you are in a marriage that involves children, it then becomes more complicated because you do not want to be selfish over your children’s needs.
I get it. Sometimes life happens, things change and over time feelings can change with it too.
It makes matters much worst when there is some kind of mistreatment or abuse involved.
I know that many of the older generation have stayed in unfulfilled marriages due to the stigma of divorce and their sense of responsibility to their families.
It was truly a different area where there weren’t a lot of options for separation.
So many women who were abused or just unhappy had a duty to stay within their marriage. They lived a very sad and lonely life until the day they died.
We tend to think that children have no idea what is going on if you just keep a smile on your face in front of them it will be okay, but they are very smart and observant.
They can feel the tension and see the unhappiness within your partnership.
It is hard for children to end up in a broken home, but even harder for them to thrive in one where the house is filled with anger, hate or lacking in warmth in love between their parents.
Now where does that leave your relationship and what advice should you take?
Because this is a partnership, it all depends on how well you can come together to work out a peaceful resolution.
You need to be strong and address the elephant in the room with your partner.
At one time there was a reason for you to want to be together, so what happened?
Sit your partner down and have an honest conversation about what you both want, If at any point one person in the relationship has made it clear that they want out then there is nothing more to do to help mend this relationship.
A partnership takes two people, if one person has mentally checked out then there is no point to try to hold on to the relationship.
You might feel guilty or wrong for haven fallen out of love, but can you see yourself being tormented by this relationship for years to come? Every day you will feel like a prisoner to this relationship.
It could be that at one time things just flowed really well and you had great chemistry, or maybe you made a mistake, ended up getting into a relationship with the wrong person. What ever the case this is your happiness and it is important to focus not on the pass but what you can do in the present right now.
“Don’t cling to a mistake just because you spent a lot of time making it.”― Aubrey de Grey
Every moment of your life, till the day you die, you are responsible for your own happiness. This is no one else’s responsibility but your own.
If you have gotten yourself in this situation, then it is time to find a solution to get yourself out of it.
It does not matter what your friends, family, or even I say. At the end of the day, you are the only one that has to live with the consequences of any decision.
Remember, not making a decision is a decision within itself.
Tell me, what is that will make you happy? What do you want to see happen or change?
Take some alone time to really think about this. This is your life after all so it will take you some time to get things sorted out.
Do not let anyone get into your head about what is right for you or your relationship.
People outside of the relationship do not have to walk in your shoes, they do not go through what you go through or feel what you feel.
Your fate and your happiness ultimately lie in your hands.
Only take action when you are clear about what you want. If you are indecisive about what decision to make, then you are not ready to take action.
You need to be clear about exactly what you want then to go for it.
Be strong, make a decision, and stick with it. There is nothing worse than putting yourself and others in a position where nobody knows if you are coming or going.
Taking a leap of faith in the unknown can be very hard, but every time you have to face a hard decision and you follow your heart and your intuition, you can never go wrong. No matter where the path leads.